


A (Somewhat) Safe Bet

by aquietdin



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Angst, Developing Relationship, Fluff, Happy Ending, Internal Conflict, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, POV Alternating, Unrequited Crush, teenagers being clueless, this turned out way more angsty than originally planned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-07-13
Packaged: 2018-06-01 05:30:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6502654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquietdin/pseuds/aquietdin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I believe what Yukiko means is... We all thought the two of you were dating each other," Naoto said, gesturing to Yosuke, then across the table to Yu.</p><p>Or: when your entire group of friends thinks you're dating your best friend. But you're not. Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd as of now, feedback is welcome!

The weather was still warm when Naoto announced she was joining the team. She was a welcome addition, as far as Yosuke was concerned - a bit smug and definitely sporting a height complex - but smart, level headed, and sharp. There was a tiny bruising to his ego, knowing that he'd been the brains of the operation before she came around, but he squashed the petty jealousy down. Naoto was good for them, all of them. He couldn't let childish envy get the best of him now.

On the roof of Junes, they'd agreed to gather at the food court once again. There was no one to save just yet, but it was good to meet sometimes, maybe dive into the TV world to keep their skills sharp. Yosuke had plopped down on the bench of the picnic table with a cold drink. It wasn't raining, but the sun was hot and the shade of the overhang was welcome. Yu sat across from him, as he normally did, drinking a bottle of that fancy sparkling water he liked.

Conversation was the usual: school, murders, the Midnight Channel. Yosuke was only half listening when Rise caught his attention.

"So, Yosuke-senpai," she said, leaning her chin on her hand. "I heard you turned down a girl in my class today."

He lifted his head at her, frowning. "Oh. Yeah."

"You did?" Yu looked genuinely surprised. "Why?"

Yosuke rubbed a sore spot where his neck met his shoulder. "Because I don't even know her, dude." He thought of the girl, a tiny thing with wire frame glasses and hair in a sideways ponytail. She'd looked terrified, approaching him at his shoe locker after school. He couldn't even remember her name now. "Sure, she was cute, but what if I said yes and then we didn't get along? That'd be mean, don't you think?"

Yu nodded solemnly and took a swig of his water. "Yeah," he agreed after finishing his drink. "It would be hard to say yes to that."

Yosuke nodded, rubbing the condensation from the can between his fingers. "Still. She was _really_ cute."

"Don't worry," Yu laughed. "I'm sure you'll find someone."

"If you know anyone, I'm all ears."

Taking a long gulp from his soda, Yosuke almost didn't notice how silent the table had gone. It was only when he glanced over to Rise that he noticed her staring. Gawking was probably a more apt description, her jaw hanging loose and wide eyed. Yosuke's gaze went to the rest of their team to find each of them in a similar state of confusion and shock.

"What?" he prompted.

They all took their time glancing at each other, silently communicating. It was Chie who spoke up first.

"So wait, you're single?"

Yosuke blinked at her, then frowned. "Yeah?"

She didn't seem to believe him. "...Are you sure?"

Annoyed, Yosuke pushed his soda away. "Am I - yes, I'm sure, jeez. Do you honestly think I'd keep it a secret if I had a girlfriend?"

Across the table, Yu huffed a tiny laugh at that, capping his water bottle. The rest of their friends were starting to redden at the cheeks, shooting each other glances that bordered on panic.

"What?" Yosuke almost snapped.

"Uh." Chie looked like she'd swallowed something sour. "We. Uh."

"We thought you were dating," Yukiko finished for her, her eyes flicking between Yosuke and his partner, who raised an eyebrow.

"I just clarified that I'm not, didn't I? Don't rub it in."

They way his friends began covering their mouths made Yosuke flash hot, like they knew some secret that he didn't. He sat up straight and looked at Yu, who only shrugged in a way that said _I have no idea._ Naoto cleared her throat and adjusted her hat.

"I believe what Yukiko means is... We all thought the two of you were dating each other," she said, gesturing to Yosuke, then across the table to Yu.

Yosuke made a face and stared at Yu, who looked like he didn't believe it either. "Ha ha," Yosuke mocked laughed. "Very funny."

But the rest of the team still looked like they'd witnessed a murder. Yosuke's stomach bottomed out.

"You're serious." His throat felt dry. "You seriously thought we -" His eyes went to his partner, equally in shock. Yosuke couldn't finish the sentence.

"It's just!" Chie barked. "You're always together, and you always sit super close, and..."

"Senpai always picks you to hang out with before the rest of us!" Rise had her little fists balled up near her face.

"You guys are real..." Kanji's face was a painful shade of red. " _Touchy-feely,_ y'know?"

"You never eat lunch with anyone else," Yukiko supplied.

Yosuke sputtered, his face going hot enough to melt. "That doesn't mean...! He's my best friend, for God's sake -"

"The background of Sensei's cell phone is a photo of him and Yosuke," Teddie chimed in.

Yosuke dared to glance at Yu. His partner's face was quickly gaining color, blushing harder than Yosuke had ever seen. Had he ever actually blushed before?

"Really?" The word tumbled out of Yosuke's mouth before he could stop it. Yu's eyes were wide, his eyebrows probably somewhere near his hairline.

"I..." Yu croaked.

Silence stretched out, so tight Yosuke felt like he might shatter. Yu was staring at him, almost unblinking. It was too much, his stomach flipping and churning.

"Gotta go," he said, or at least tried to say, as he bolted up from the table and turned away. Yosuke made a mad dash for the elevator, ignoring how Yu called his name and how his friends gasped. He ran all the way home, went straight to his room, and slammed the door.

\-----

At the picnic table at Junes' roof, Yu slumped back into his seat. He'd gotten up so fast that he'd shoved the table away a few inches. His head was still spinning.

"This could be a problem," Naoto said from somewhere far away. Yu barely heard her, resisting the urge to open his phone and look at the background photo.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Three bumps into passerbys. Four trips over nothing. Honked at by cars for not paying attention twice. One stubbed toe, two papercuts, and one mangled carrot that was beyond saving.

Yu was having trouble, to say the least.

His walk home from the food court had been... something. Awkward. Panicky. Terrible. Chie had walked halfway with him, her home in the same direction, chattering and laughing nervously. Yu couldn't recall what she'd even said, his head swimming and pounding all at once.

He was now attempting to cook dinner, and 'attempt' really was the key word. It was supposed to be a curry, but it was quickly turning into a nondescript beef stew, his brain too scattered to concentrate on any one thing (including properly browning the meat, most of it having to be pried off the bottom of the pan nearly blackened). He rubbed his temples, half annoyed. His ability to focus, to stay on track - it was one of the few things he prided himself on. He wasn't shaken easily, not by tests or gossip or moving in with relatives he'd basically never met.

Naoto's words at the picnic table had sure done the trick, though.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, and Yu lowered the flame below the simmering stew to check it. It was a text from Yukiko, a simple 'How are you doing?' Yu didn't have the slightest clue how to answer. So he typed out 'Fine' and hit send. A little animated icon of an envelope rushing away played on the screen, followed by a chime. The mailbox minimized, and Yu's breath caught.

The background image of his phone stared at him. It was of him and Yosuke, arms around each others shoulders, each sporting wide smiles that belied their bruises and bandages. It was the selfie they'd taken together at the riverbed after their brawl, the one Yosuke insisted on. It had taken four tries before they were both happy with the shot, the discarded attempts containing awkward angles and forced grins.

Yosuke's temple was pressed against Yu's cheek in the photo as he gave a thumbs up. The whole thing looked so warm and genuine, he'd set it to his background right away. Yu normally hated having his photo taken, but he looked so at home in this one, his left eye squinting at the golden brown hair that was almost in it. Was it weird? To keep a good photo of your best friend on your phone? Yu hadn't thought it was, but-

"Is something burning?"

Nearly dropping his phone, Yu snapped to attention. Indeed, something was burning, namely the roux he was supposed to be carefully preparing. He all but threw his phone onto the counter and snatched the saucepot away from the stove. The roux was dark, but not quite burnt yet. Setting the hot saucepan in the sink, Yu turned off the second burner and found his wooden spoon again.

Dojima approached him, circling the kitchen table. "Everything alright?"

Yu physically jumped at the question, then exhaled at his uncle. He began to stir the nearly devastated roux, willing his nerves to quiet themselves and hoping his neck wasn't as red as it felt.

"Yes, I'm just..." He searched. "A little distracted."

Dojima grunted, the sound that said he understood but didn't necessarily agree. He picked up Yu's phone from the counter, still flipped open and on the home screen.

"You in trouble?" he asked. Yu's jaw went slack.

"No! No, nothing like that."

Another grunt. "Hanamura, huh?" Dojima was looking at his background, the photo of the two of them. Yu stopped stirring. "You sure you didn't get into anything?" Dojima prompted again.

Sighing, Yu let go of the pot and spoon, and held a hand out for his phone. "He's not a troublemaker."

"I didn't say he was."

Yu's phone was returned to his hand. He flipped it closed and pocketed it. "Not with words." He stacked two potholders on the counter and set the roux pot on them, then went to stirring the main stew. "I'm not in trouble, and neither is he," Yu promised. "It's just... things between friends."

Yu put all his attention on the meal in the pot, but he could feel Dojima's scrutinizing gaze on him. He'd used it quite a lot since they'd been brought in that one time. Since Yosuke forgot about things like laws for a hot second and decided swinging live steel in a food court was an excellent way to express friendship. He never did tell Yu where he'd gotten the swords.

"Girl trouble?"

His arm jerked so suddenly that Yu splashed stew out of the pot, splattering the counter with broth and onion. He sputtered at Dojima to find his uncle grinning wide, predatory, and smug. Yu frowned and shook his head.

Dojima laughed. "Yeah, sure. Just remember, this is a small town." He clapped Yu on the shoulder. "Try not to break too many hearts."

His uncle didn't say anything else, and Yu finished cooking the almost curry. Nanako didn't complain about the obviously lack of flavor, but she didn't compliment the meal like she normally did. Yu finished half of his bowl and decided his stomach had enough excitement for one day.

He did the dishes, though barely remembered doing them, bathed quickly, then went upstairs. Yu ignored his homework and pulled out his futon. It was late, and today had been so long, spiked with an adrenaline surge that he hadn't really budgeted energy for.

His sheets were stiff, scratchy, and in need of a wash. But Yu was more concerned with his phone. He and Yosuke would normally text each other about this time, usually just nonsense about class or saying goodnight. No texts came.

Yu then flipped through his photo album, mildly horrified at what he saw. At least half of the photos were of cats, strays and friend's pets and ones he met in pet stores. The other half was divided between Nanako and his friends - and of the photos of his friends, there was a commonality. Yosuke was front and center in nearly all of them, often hanging off of Yu, one arm outstretched to help cradle the phone, the other around Yu's shoulders. He was winking in many of them, too.

One picture even had Yosuke holding his own phone up, smirking to the side. Yu remember that day. They'd each taken a photo at the same time, and Yosuke ended up with a similar picture of Yu. It was a nice photo, too, Yosuke's smile gentle instead of his usual wide, toothy grin.

A tiny impulse told him to delete the photos, but it was silenced in a heartbeat. These were his friends, no matter what. Getting rid of them was out of the question.

But before he closed his phone for the night, he switched his background image to a photo he'd taken of the Samegawa river in spring. Yu rolled over, sighing, and waited for sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Don't think about it. Don't think about it. Don't think about it.

Yosuke repeated the mantra in his head a few dozen times while he brushed his teeth. He'd practically run screaming from Junes after his friends pulled that little stunt. He'd forgotten to do his homework and went to bed with wet hair, resulting in having to wet it again this morning just to keep it from being a frizzy, curly mess.

He didn't realize how long he'd been brushing his teeth until he heard his mother call him from downstairs.

His mother offered him eggs and toast, and he ate, although nerves had put his stomach in knots. This was dumb, this was stupid. Why would his friends think that? Why wouldn't they say anything?

Yosuke took a different route to school, bypassing the floodplain entirely.

It wasn't like he could avoid Yu forever. The guy sat in front of him in class. Plus, the odds that they were done with business in the TV world were slim. Probably non existent, if Yosuke factored his never ending bad luck into the equation. They'd have to talk about it, eventually, and that would be super awkward. What do you even say to that?

Whoops, all our friends think we're hot for each other. Hilarious, right? Wanna go get some food?

Yosuke kicked a rock by his feet and snorted to himself. This had to be a joke. So maybe he was close to Yu - could anyone blame him? He couldn't claim to have had any real friends since moving to Inaba. Maybe Chie, but before the TV world, they had just barely crossed over from Acquaintance. And before that, in the city, he'd always been the awkward kid, too weird for anyone to risk getting close. He had casual friends, people he'd talk to in class, but...

A real friend, a best friend, someone to hang out with and share secrets and dreams and fears? That was something he'd never known before Yu.

In hindsight maybe he'd been overenthusiastic about it, like an excited child unable to sleep on Christmas Eve, latching on to 'Partner' and never letting go.

Yosuke stopped dead in his tracks, the school in view, a cold shiver going down his spine. Everyone at school knew he called Yu his Partner, they heard it, saw him do it. He'd seen the looks he'd get from girls when Yu spent his lunch hour with Yosuke instead of any of them.

Did they all think it too, then? Was it not isolated inside their group?

The only thing that kept Yosuke from turning around was knowing that if he skipped school, his mother would literally kill him.

\-----

He almost ended up being late, scurrying in the doors and cramming his shoes into his locker right as the first bell was ringing.

Yu was already in his seat when Yosuke entered, shoving his bag in a random cubby at the back of the room and sliding into his chair. Yu didn't turn to greet him, and Yosuke froze up, thinking maybe his Partner was mad. Was this his fault? Because he was too... touchy-feely, like Kanji had said? His head was beginning to throb.

"Hanamura!"

Yosuke's head snapped up to find Kashiwagi sitting on her desk, a book in hand, pointing at him. He stood from his chair in a panic.

"Since you came in late, you can answer the question. Or are you too busy daydreaming again?" Kashiwagi prompted. Yosuke gulped. He hadn't even heard it. As usual.

A tiny, rhythmic tapping caught his attention. Yosuke glanced down, at the desk ahead of him. Yu was looking forward, hunched over, tapping his pencil on a single word hastily scrawled in his notebook.

"Metric," he read out loud. Kashiwagi raised an eyebrow at him.

"I'll let you off the hook this time," She drawled. Yosuke thumped back into his chair.

Yu's face was turned just enough that Yosuke could see one of his eyes. "Thanks, par-" He began, but stopped, tripping on the word. He wasn't sure, but he thought he saw Yu's eye widen as he turned to face front. It might have been Yosuke's imagination, but he could've sworn his ears looked pink.

\-----

When the lunch bell rang, Yosuke jumped in his seat. Ahead of him, Yu stretched his arms over his head, not turning back. Beside him, Chie had turned in her chair, nervously glancing between the two boys.

"So Yu," she began, an obvious tremor in her voice. "Did you bring lunch today...?"

Yu turned in his seat, not far enough to face Yosuke, and shook his head. "Just a snack today, not enough to share. Sorry." A scrape of wood on the floor and Yu was standing, going for his bag in the back shelves. He pulled something out, wrapped in colored foil. Probably a granola bar or something. He caught Yosuke's eyes, and Yosuke panicked, not even realizing he'd been tracking his friend's movements the whole time.

"I'm going to go get some air," Yosuke heard Yu say. Then the classroom door opened and shut.

It was at least thirty more seconds before Yosuke let out the breath he was holding. He folded his arms on his desk and let his forehead thump against them.

Other students were chattering and milling about. Yosuke pondered putting on his headphones to drown them out when Chie spoke up.

"Hey, you okay?"

He opened one eye at her. "Peachy."

He could hear Chie fidgeting. "Are you guys fighting?"

Yosuke lifted his head at that, and gave a lopsided frown. "No, we're..." Not speaking? Ignoring each other? Up to an 11 on the awkward and uncomfortable scale? "I dunno."

Yukiko got up from her chair and came to stand next to his desk. She kept her hands behind her back, shifting her weight.

"Yosuke, we're sorry about yesterday. We shouldn't have made assumptions."

Chie was nodding, and Yosuke could feel his face going hotter by the minute. Any other time, he'd look to his Partner for advice. Because Yu was smart and calm and could handle anything thrown at him with an eerie kind of finesse, be it shadows or murders or creepy as hell teachers.

"We didn't mean to make it, y'know." Chie was fumbling with her words. "Weird. But you guys should be okay, right? You're best friends."

Frowning, Yosuke straightened up in his chair. One day - not even, a half a day - of awkward distance between them was already too much. He felt another wave of heat wash over his body, embarrassment and maybe shame, at having let such a trivial thing get to him.

"Yeah." Yosuke stood and pushed in his chair. "You're right." With that, he turned and left the room.

\-----

Yu was on the roof, just like he always was. Yosuke didn't bother looking anywhere else for him. His Partner liked the roof, he'd said so himself. Up here, it was quiet. He could slow down and think, have a few minutes away from the chronic noise of the world around him. Yosuke had once mused that Yu probably needed more quiet time than the rest of them, what with the million or so Personas he always seemed to have. Sometimes Susano-O was more than Yosuke could handle, his voice booming and echoing between his ears. The idea of more than one of him was... unpleasant, to say the least.

Steeling himself, Yosuke marched over to where Yu sat, near the fence on the far side. Yu heard him coming and snapped to attention. Yosuke ignored his brain's impulse to run and sat down near him. Not too near, though.

Yu stared at him. An empty wrapper was by his feet, one cheek hamstered out as he chewed the last of his snack. Yosuke leaned back on his hands.

"You okay?" Yosuke began, his voice cracking.

Nodding, Yu faced forward again, looking out towards the mountains. He swallowed his food and went still. Yosuke went to reach for him, the movement totally automatic. When his hand connected, Yu inhaled a sharp gasp and jerked away.

Yosuke lurched in the opposite direction, startled by the reaction. Uncomfortable silence settled over them.

Yu was the first to move, exhaling and letting his shoulders slump. "Sorry." He rubbed at the back of his neck. "I'm jumpy, I guess."

"Yeah," Yosuke agreed. "Me too."

More silence. Yosuke sighed loudly, letting his annoyance come through.

"Dude. This is dumb."

Yu looked at Yosuke's shoes. Not quite his face, but it was a start.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." This was awful. Yosuke's stomach was flipping back and forth, like the time he'd taken the print club photo with Saki. Only worse. "We should forget this crap ever happened. I mean..." He swallowed thickly. "You didn't think we were, uh, dating. Right?"

"No! No," Yu answered quickly. "It... took me by surprise, too."

Forcing a laugh, Yosuke punched Yu's shoulder lightly. "Man. Those guys cannot read people at all, can they?"

Yu's laugh sounded equally forced, but it still eased Yosuke's buzzing nerves. "We've all seen some weird things." He was thoughtful for a moment before continuing. "They say people who undergo combat situations together become even closer than friends or family."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." Yu picked up the wrapper by his feet and crumpled it in his hand. "That's us. I don't think I've ever had a friend like you, and I'm pretty sure the frequent life or death situations is the reason why."

Yosuke stared out at the mountain. He hadn't really thought of it that way, of himself and Yu as war buddies or whatever, but it made sense. Most people couldn't honestly say they'd had someone save their life, especially more than once.

"Yeah, that's - that sounds right. You've had my back more times than I can count, Partner."

Yu uncurled his legs and stretched them out, his form relaxing. "I think maybe everyone read more into it because they're not used to the idea of that." He turned to Yosuke, smiling softly, still tense but not nearly as much as earlier. "Know what I mean?"

Yosuke laughed then, genuine, letting his apprehension melt away. It was odd to hear Yu talk so much, especially about himself. But true to form, his words were carefully chosen. "Yeah. Man." He ran a hand through his hair, nerves still on edge, but already feeling relieved. "That was a little freaky."

A laugh. "That it was."

The warning bell rang, and they both stood, brushing dirt from their uniforms. Yu pocketed the wrapper of his snack and touched Yosuke's shoulder, feather light.

"Yosuke, you're my best friend, and nothing will change that." His voice was quiet in a way that put a part of Yosuke back on edge. "You know that, right?"

There was a few seconds of doubt, a warning softly chiming somewhere in the back of Yosuke's mind. He brushed it away with a wide grin, punching Yu's bicep.

"Aw man, don't get to sappy on me!" Yosuke rubbed at his nose. "Now let's get going, before Kashiwagi chews us out again."

They returned to class, and Yosuke was relieved to no longer feel awful nervous tension whenever he looked forward at a head of grey hair. After school he had a shift at Junes, which he was late for since he spend extra time talking to Yu and Chie by the shoe lockers.

Work done, Yosuke came home and begrudgingly did his homework. He texted Yu a few times, the usual chit chat and dirty jokes. The usual light hearted replies came back.

_Goodnight, Partner._

Yosuke's finger hovered over the send button. It was the same thing he'd typed every night for months. His stomach was still fluttering, though, a rush of nerves going through him at the sight of the text.

Shaking his head, Yosuke hit send and closed his phone. It was just leftover nerves from the day, nothing more. He'd feel better tomorrow. And later, this would make a hilarious story. He was sure of it.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Teenagers are clueless and I refuse to believe that Yu would be any different. Unbeta'd, feedback is welcome!

"Are you and Yosuke fighting?"

Yu froze up immediately, basketball in one hand and cleaning cloth in the other. Kou's question had been innocent enough, just small talk to the untrained ear, but it made Yu's heart fly into his throat for a split second. He frowned, shaking his head and letting his expression blank out.

"No, why?"

Kou shrugged, tossing a clean basketball underhanded into the gym cart. "I just haven't seen you two together much lately." He picked up a ball from the floor and began wiping away the dirt. "You guys are normally inseparable."

That made Yu's stomach go just a bit sour. It was true; in the week since Naoto revealed the group's collective misunderstanding, Yu had spend considerably less time with his best friend. None at all if he didn't count lunches.

"We've both just been busy," came Yu's response. Not quite the truth, but not a lie, either. Kou didn't ask about it again.

On his walk home, Yu went through his text messages. Yosuke's thread was topped out at 300, the most his phone would store. It meant that the very first text was long gone, Yu realized sadly, their first hellos shoved out by long nights of bad puns, panicking about exams, and speculations about the TV world. Yu would often have to read the texts out loud to himself just to make sense of Yosuke's bizarre shorthand.

The messages had slowed to a trickle, from both sides. Yosuke's messages were usually only a word or two, and Yu's were the same. He wasn't deliberately keeping his Partner at arm's length, but it seemed to be an unfortunate side effect of the fallout.

Yu hit 'compose' and typed out a text before going inside his home. He'd promised to spend the evening with Nanako, and for better or worse, his cousin trumped almost everyone else.

_We should hang out soon. Are you free this weekend?_

His phone buzzed while he was cooking, but Yu didn't check it until he was in his pajamas and ready for bed.

_got wrk on sunday, mb sat??_

Yu smiled, clicking out one last response before closing his phone and rolling over.

_Sure, just let me know._

\-----

Yu was heading for the shoe lockers the next day as Rise came bounding up to him, her pigtails swaying, her smile as bright as ever.

"Senpai!" she called to him. Yu suppressed a wince as every boy within earshot turned to glare at him.

"Hey, do you want to hang out this afternoon?" Rise cut right to the chase, folding her arms innocently behind her back.

"Actually," Yu pulled his loafers from his locker. "I have some errands to run today, sorry."

Her bottom lip stuck out in a tiny pout. "Aw." As Yu changed out of his school shoes, he noticed Rise doing the same, sliding up to his side as he went for the door.

"Can I walk with you?" she batted her eyelashes at him.

Her request wasn't surprising in the slightest. Rise had taken a shine to him right away, being surprisingly forward in her advances. It had stopped a month ago, seemingly unprovoked -

Oh. Right. That would be why.

"Sure," he answered.

They left the school together, and the looks of contempt from other students weren't lost on Yu. Rise didn't seem to notice at all, chattering away about school, performing, and working in her grandmother's shop. Somewhere around the Samegawa, she put both of her arms around Yu's elbow, hugging his arm. Yu didn't stop her or shrug out of her grip, even if a tiny part of him panicked when she did, the back of his arm pressed against her chest.

"Well, I should head home," Rise said as they stopped at an intersection near the shopping district. "Thanks for walking with me, Senpai!"

"Sure thing," Yu said, carefully extracting his arm.

"Hey," Rise was fidgeting now. "So... you're really single, huh?"

Yu nodded, watching her face brighten as he did.

"So... would you maybe want to go somewhere with me this weekend? Like Sunday?"

He honestly should have seen this coming, but Yu's eyebrows still went up in surprise. Rise was asking him out. Her request didn't leave much room for interpretation, especially given what she'd asked immediately before. Combine that with her body language and tone, and. Well.

But it wasn't as if he disliked Rise. She was smart, cheerful, energetic and talkative - everything he liked in a person, or at least as much as he could figure by this point. If he had a 'type,' she was probably it. Maybe, if given the chance, they could be close. It was a nice thought, anyway, the idea of being in love.

"I'm free on Sunday," Yu heard himself say.

"Great!" Rise grinned wide and jogged a few feet away. "I'll text you later. We're going to have fun!" And then she skipped off towards Marukyu.

Yu watched her leave before turning towards the Dojima house, his nerves buzzing.

\-----

The last few days of the week sped by. Friday greeted Yu with a light drizzle, and he took his time walking home from school, enjoying the smell of rain and earth along the river. Nanako greeted him and, for once, his uncle, sitting at the kitchen table with a newspaper and a cup of coffee.

"Any plans this weekend?" Dojima asked him over dinner.

"I'm going out on Sunday," Yu answered, setting down his soup. "Not for the entire day, though."

"Oh?" Dojima's brow creased, the sign that a string of questions was about to follow. "With who?"

Yu had to swallow his bite of food before answering. "Rise Kujikawa."

"You're going out with Risette?" Nanako nearly shrieked.

Dojima looked surprised, then amused, then smug. "A date?"

Yu nodded, feeling warm. Dojima didn't pry any further. Nanako seemed ecstatic that her big bro was dating someone famous, and spent the rest of dinner making sure Yu knew to bring Rise flowers, tell her she was pretty, and a long list of other bits of advice.

As he washed the dishes, Yu frowned at himself. Nanako seemed more excited about his date than he was, though he couldn't pinpoint why. It was probably because he knew Rise fairly well at this point, having seen her darkest secrets and greatest strengths. This should be fine.

Just fine.

\-----

The bell rang at the end of classes on Saturday, and Yu stretched in his seat. He was planning on hitting the library to get his homework out of the way now, so he could spend today relaxing and tomorrow with Rise.

"Hey, Partner," Yosuke had stood from his chair and was also stretching, the week catching up to both of them. "I actually got tomorrow off, someone wanted to switch shifts with me. You still wanna hang out?"

Yu's face fell. "Oh. Sorry, Yosuke," he turned in his seat. "But I made plans."

"...Oh." Yosuke was crestfallen.

"It's just-" the words tumbled out of Yu's mouth in a rush. "You said you were working, so-"

Yosuke's eyes skimmed over the floor for just a second before he shrugged. "Ah, don't worry about it, man. That one's on me." He winked at Yu, grinning. Yu knew that face. It was Yosuke's mask, the one he'd put on if he was afraid of being a burden. When he didn't want to let it show that he was hurt. Something tugged in Yu's gut.

"We can hang out next week. Want to come over for dinner or something?"

Yosuke's face brightened at that, his smile stretching to wrinkle the skin next to his eyes. "If you're cooking, then you had me at 'dinner,' dude."

Laughing, Yu stood and gathered his books. "Text me your schedule later." Yosuke nodded and left, and Yu went down the hall to trudge through English and Math.

\-----

Sunday morning, Yu was awoken by the sun coming through his curtains instead of his alarm. He'd set it for nine, allowing himself to sleep in one day a week. He was sure many of his friends would balk at nine in the morning as 'sleeping in,' but given how early he awoke for school every other day, it was a luxury.

He checked his phone and found it read 8:56. Sometimes he had excellent timing.

Yu made breakfast and helped Nanako with the week's laundry. Rise had asked him to meet her at the train station at 2, apparently for lunch and a movie in Okina.

For a date.

Not telling Yosuke that he had a date with Rise was deliberate, at least mostly. Yu knew how much of a fan his partner was of the teen idol. Their friendship was finally on the mend after a week of constant tension. He didn't want to risk adding jealousy into the mix.

There was another factor there, something low and dangerous that Yu didn't want to acknowledge. At least not yet. He could deal with it later.

\-----

"Senpai!"

Rise greeted him in her usual cheerful demeanor. Her white dress and pink leggings made her stand out in the dusty, worn train station. Yu had just worn one of his polo shirts, the weather still a bit too warm for anything else. Rise took his arm immediately, and Yu let her.

The train ride was uneventful, their chatter not much different from what it was around their friends. Except today, Rise was leaning into his side, much more than she would when they were at Junes discussing murders. Yu didn't really mind her attention, but somewhere in the back of his mind, he wondered why he didn't really like it, either. It all felt very neutral, neither good nor bad. He didn't know what to make of that, so he let Rise do as she pleased, hoping maybe something would click into place eventually.

Rise insisted on buying lunch, so Yu paid for the movie. It seemed fair, and he was sure that's what men usually did on dates. Pay for things, open doors. Yu did them automatically, and Rise seemed pleased, shooting him winks and hugging his arm.

The date was fun, all things considered. His tofu had been overcooked but the movie was lighthearted and silly, and he recounted the details with Rise on the train back to Inaba. It still felt like something was missing, something that would make the day feel like an actual date and not just another outing.

Rise led Yu down by the Samegawa on their way home, the sun beginning its slow descent towards the mountains. Their conversation had long since gone silent, the quiet broken by the crunching of grass and river rocks under their shoes.

"Hey, Senpai?"

Rise had stopped and turned towards him, taking both of Yu's hands in hers. Her fingers were tiny and delicate.

"I had a really great time today," Rise said softly, looking up at him through her lashes.

"Me too." Yu heard his voice, but he didn't remember sending the signal to say the words. Time was slowing and reality felt just a hair off-kilter.

Rise was staring at him, though him, her eyes darting between his. Yu realized he should probably say something, or do something. Before he could process what that thing was, Rise stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his.

He first registered her lip gloss, strawberries, sticky and warm. A breath from her nose blowing soft against his face. She was trembling a little, probably from having to balance on the balls of her feet to meet his height.

Rise pulled away, their mouths breaking apart with a tiny sound. She smiled up at him, bashful, one hand letting his go to tuck a bit of hair behind her ear.

"We should do this again sometime," Rise said. Her voice was almost drowned out by the sound of the river beside him.

"Sure." Automatic response. But Rise accepted it, giving him a smile and a goodnight as she climbed the stairs to the main walkway and skipped off towards the shopping district.

Yu stood frozen on the bank of the Samegawa for several minutes. He wasn't really sure how to process what happened. That was, for all intents and purposes, his first kiss. The first one he could count, anyway, the first that didn't come from family. He was pretty sure first kisses were supposed to be monumental, or maybe have some impact.

He didn't feel anything when Rise kissed him, not really. Was he thinking about it too hard? Or was this another aspect of life that movies and media tended to over embelish - maybe kisses weren't the earth shattering event that he'd been led to believe.

Wiping lip gloss from his mouth with the back of his hand, Yu started towards the riverbank steps. He got one leg up and stopped. In his peripheral vision, there was a flash of orange, glowing in the sunset.

Yosuke stared back at him, headphones on, soda in one hand. He was far enough away that Yu couldn't read his expression. Yosuke stood there for two more beats before he turned and walked away.

A voice in Yu's head screeched at him to go after his best friend, but he remained rooted to the stairs, the river bubbling behind him.


	5. Chapter 5

Yosuke slammed his bedroom door shut, immediately wincing afterwards. His mother would probably have his ear for that.

His room was quiet and empty. Teddie was either downstairs or at work or who knows where, anywhere else, because Yosuke didn't have it in him to deal with him right now. He paced across his floor, kicking shirts and jeans out of his way as he went, seething.

Yosuke pressed his fingers against his eyes, trying to scrub away the memory. He'd seen Yu kissing Rise. His best friend was kissing an idol. A girl he'd dreamed about more times than he could count, gorgeous, perfect Rise.

She'd been smitten with his Partner since the moment they met and had never spared Yosuke so much as a second glance. Of course. Even though Yu had barely known who she was at all and hardly seemed to care. It wasn't fair. Yu had everything, good looks and finesse and good grades - of fucking _course_ he was gobbling up the hearts of every girl at school - and hell, even some of the guys - and Yosuke was still single, still following Yu around like some pathetic puppy living off his scraps -

There was a tugging in his chest, and Yosuke's train of thought slowed to a crawl. The voice was soft and low, but it was there. Susano-O's whispers bounced around in his brain. His Persona didn't talk, not really, but spoke in feelings, spikes of emotion. And right now, he was telling Yosuke that he was being a selfish brat.

He thought that maybe if Susano-O could talk, he'd probably use a lot more profanity.

Yosuke knew his thoughts were ugly. He _knew,_ but he couldn't help it. Well, okay, maybe he could, but giving in to them for just a second had felt good.

Sighing, Yosuke flopped down onto his bed. This was his partner he was talking about. He had to stop thinking like this, get over his jealousy and move on. If he didn't, he'd be facing down another shadow in no time. And he didn't want to think about what the second one would have to say.

\-----

Ten minutes before the final bell at school the next day, Yosuke's phone vibrated in his pocket. It was a text from Yu, sent to everyone in the Investigation Team, calling to meet up at Junes an hour later. There was a light drizzle outside, just enough to fog the windows of the school. His partner probably wanted to go item hunting in the TV World, his (seemingly) favorite activity for rainy days.

As they packed up their books, Yosuke nodded at Yu, then at Chie and Yukiko. He excused himself ("I need to grab something to eat, I'll see you at the food court"), and made a beeline for the shopping district.

Comfortably full of steak croquette, Yosuke was diving into the TV right behind Yu. His landings had improved significantly since his first venture in. Now he was able to land on his feet at least half the time, and the other half, roll away to stand.

"We're hitting Void Quest," Yu announced. There was a collective sigh of relief from the team; at least they wouldn't be going into any of their worlds today. No matter how many times they went back, everyone's creations never got easier to stomach. Even Yukiko still cringed at her Castle, and it had been months.

Yosuke knew Yu had this weird need to help anyone and everyone, including going on endless fetch quests for random junk. It probably should have irritated Yosuke, the way he'd dive for the strongest shadows for a plate or a scale or a broken lantern, but at least he got training in, not to mention their growing stockpile of cash for weapons and gear.

And then Yu went charging at a shadow, huge and glowing red, and Yosuke cursed none too quietly.

The shadow morphed into a pair of magician hands. Yosuke hated those things, they were creepy and weird and made him angry that they looked like his arcana's namesake. At least they weren't that tough.

"Yatagarasu!"

Yu was already in gear, casting a high level fire spell while Yosuke, Kanji, and Chie used physical attacks. Yosuke sometimes thought that maybe Yu was a different person in battle. Any other time, he was calm and cool and had a world-class poker face. But here, with shadows and monsters chasing after them, it was like a switch would flip. Yu would become a battle god, fierce and merciless and unflinching.

It was incredible to watch.

One magician hand fell with a screech and a puff of red smoke. One to go.

The remaining hand reared up to cast a spell, directing the energy at Yu. Yosuke stared in horror as the air around his Partner shimmered, ice crystals forming a half second before Yu was incased in ice.

He still had the three-legged crow equipped. _He was weak to ice._

Yu let out a garbled scream and crumbled, his back hitting the ground. The magician hand saw the opportunity and made to cast again. Yosuke's feet were moving before his brain even caught up, planting him right in front of Yu.

The bufu spell hurt. God, did it _hurt,_ like his lungs had filled up with solid ice instead of air. Yosuke swore he could feel his blood slowing to a crawl in his veins. And as soon as it was over, his skin prickled and burned like he'd been set on fire, his chest constricting. He hated ice spells, almost as much as lightning.

Yosuke heard Kanji's howl of rage, and the magician hand was gone. He stumbled forward but managed to stay standing, turning to help Yu up. His partner was gulping down air, looking pale. Yosuke cast Diarama and blew out a puff of breath as the color returned to Yu's cheeks.

"You okay?" Chie directed her question mostly at Yu, then motioned to Yosuke as an afterthought. Yosuke let it go. Seeing Yu nod and straighten up was enough to dispel his irritation.

Kanji joined them, resting his steel chair against his leg. "Should we call it a day? That was a close one, Senpai."

Yu chewed his lip, then nodded. "I have what I came in for."

\-----

They ended up hanging around by the exit for a while, waiting for customers to clear the electronics section. Rise went straight for Yu upon their return, latching onto his elbow and checking him over for injuries. There was a bitter tang in the back of Yosuke's mouth, and he swallowed around it. _No, I'm fine, just almost frozen to death saving our leader's life. It's cool._

Yu sat against the railing and Rise wasted no time in joining him. They spoke quietly - Yu said something that made Rise's bottom lip stick out, but Yosuke couldn't hear. No one else on the team was ever that close. Maybe Chie and Yukiko, but they were something different altogether. At least Yosuke thought so. His stomach churned.

The warm air outside Junes felt heavenly after today's ordeal. Yosuke rubbed his arms and suppressed a sneeze.

"I'm headin' home," Kanji spoke up. "See you guys tomorrow."

Yukiko and Chie went off together as Naoto tipped her hat and briskly walked away. Teddie waved and bounced off towards home. Rise had suction-cupped herself to Yu's side.

The sight made Yosuke feel sick, like his stomach wanted to turn itself inside out, his eyes burning and hands shaking. This was bad, this was so bad, it hurt and he hated this feeling and he wouldn't be able to sleep unless he faced it.

"Partner?"

Yu turned to Yosuke. If their leader noticed how Yosuke's voice shook, he didn't point it out.

"Walk home with me? I need to talk to you." Yosuke's eyes flicked over to Rise, hoping his silent _just you_ would be understood.

Yu's eyes lit up a bit, and he nodded, then turned to the girl that was holding his left arm prisoner. "Can you excuse us, Rise?"

He'd half expected her to put up a fight, but Yosuke was relieved to see Rise smile and release Yu's arm. "Sure thing. See you tomorrow Senpai!" She ended her sentence with a wink as she walked away, a spring in her step that Yosuke hadn't seen since her last television special.

Yu fell in step next to Yosuke as they turned down a familiar street towards the Samegawa. Every nerve in Yosuke's body was tying itself in knots. Yu slowed to a stop near a deserted section away from the street lights. He faced the river, not Yosuke, and spoke.

"What's on your mind?"

Everything he wanted to say jumbled up in Yosuke's throat in a rush to get out that he ended up with his jaw slack, only a few sputtering sounds coming out. He didn't know where to start. He was jealous and angry and it just wasn't fair and why did he have all the shitty luck -

Yosuke groaned, rubbing at his forehead with the heel of his hand. Once he sorted the words out, they sounded so stupid and immature. Yu hadn't said anything, just stood there waiting for a reply. The guy had the patience of a freaking saint.

"I saw you and Rise last night," finally came tumbling out of his mouth.

Yu nodded, something almost like a frown on his face. "I know."

Yosuke threaded his fingers into his hair and pulled. Of course Yu knew, he'd seen him just the same. "I just-" and the dam broke and Yosuke wouldn't have been able to stop the words if he tried.

"I just got so freaking jealous, like, I've been in love with her for fuck knows how long but she's never even wanted to talk to me. Y'know? I'm a joke to her, but she's all over you, just like Yukiko and that Ebihara girl and the chick from the drama club and - fuck." His mouth was watering and he had to stop and swallow, breathing hard. "This is dumb. I'm sorry."

Yu didn't respond, and it was several tense seconds before Yosuke let go of his hair and looked at his Partner. Yu looked shocked, genuinely shocked. It wasn't something Yosuke saw often. If ever. It only made Yosuke feel worse.

"Sorry," he apologized again.

"No," Yu began. "It's - I'm. Uh."

Yu was stuttering and Yosuke was sure the whole planet must have stopped turning.

"I'm sorry," Yu said, his eyes cast downward.

Yosuke did a double take. "Wha- dude, why the hell are _you_ apologizing?"

Yu stood still, his back rigid. "I didn't know I was making you feel..." He shook his head. "I wasn't doing it on purpose."

With a huff, Yosuke stared out at the river, the features of individual rocks disappearing into darkness as the setting sun cast long shadows over the valley. This was not what he was expecting. Well, okay, he didn't really know what to expect, but it certainly wasn't this. It wasn't Yu looking like a kid who'd been scolded.

"Oh my god," Yosuke whispered.

"Sorry."

Yosuke swatted Yu's bicep. "Quit apologizing. You didn't do anything wrong." He took a deep breath and buried his hands in his pockets, hunching his shoulders as if to hide behind his headphones. "I was just jealous."

"I'm not dating her," Yu said in a rush. Yosuke blinked at him.

"Huh?"

"Rise," Yu clarified. "I'm not dating her. We just went to a movie."

Relief welled up in Yosuke's gut, and he pushed it down, calling up his best grin. "Well, why not, man?" He patted Yu's shoulder and laughed. "She's crazy about you."

But Yu didn't look excited, chewing on his bottom lip. He opened his mouth to speak, and Yosuke shushed him with a wag of his finger.

"You should go out with her again. Don't worry about me, okay? I'll be fine."

Yu's eyes went from Yosuke's face to the ground several times. He nodded, though he looked anything but sure. Yosuke ended the conversation by ushering Yu towards the foot bridge, eagerly changing the subject to a video game that was coming out soon. Yu seemed to be only half listening, his gaze locked on something far away.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Partner!" Yosuke waved as they went separate ways.

In his bed that night, Yosuke lay awake, listening to Teddie's soft murmurs from the closet. He told Yu the truth, gushed all his feelings out in a gross heap. And he felt better for it. Mostly. The slight unease was still there, his stomach just a touch sour. But it wasn't as bad as it was before. Yosuke threw his arm over his eyes and sighed. He'd get over it eventually. Then everything could go back to normal.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing teenagers having a fight was actually rather difficult, mainly because I didn't want them to be out of character, but I also wanted to capture the confusion that can happen from a fight caused by miscommunication or lack of understanding. Feedback is welcome!

After basketball practice on Tuesday, Yu went straight for Junes. It had taken a bit of prodding, but Yosuke had finally revealed his work schedule for the week. And since he'd be off the next day, Yu was planning on making the dinner he'd promised.

He didn't run into Yosuke in the grocery section, thankfully. Oddly, he wanted the dinner to be a surprise. A few months back, Yu had made stewed beef for dinner, and shared the leftovers with Yosuke the next day. His friend didn't stop gushing about it for weeks to come. Yu smiled at the memory as he picked out a thick cut of meat.

On his way home, he texted Yosuke with a invitation for food and studying. The reply came back less than a minute later, accompanied with far too many exclamation points and strange patterns Yu supposed were smiley faces.

\-----

Wednesday went by agonizingly slow. Yu had butterflies all day, though he wasn't entirely sure why. Perhaps it was because he'd finally get to hang out with his best friend again. It felt like ages since he'd last done so, and he missed Yosuke. Even if they spent their school days only a few feet apart, it wasn't really the same.

Yu turned in his chair as the final bell rang, grinning wide. Yosuke grinned back, and it felt so warm, like sunshine.

"I'm gonna stop at home real quick," Yosuke said, zipping up his pencil bag. "I'll be over in a bit. That cool?"

Yu nodded, and they went their separate ways. It was good that Yosuke was taking his time, it would give Yu a chance to take care of the prep work for the meal. That way they could spend more time together, instead of one in the kitchen and the other somewhere else.

Yosuke was ringing the bell less than a half hour later. He'd changed into one of his orange v-neck shirts that showed off his neck and collarbone. Yu had removed his uniform jacket and rolled up his sleeves, but was otherwise unchanged.

"Whatcha makin', partner?"

Yu smiled proudly. "Stewed beef."

Yosuke's face became impossibly brighter, even as he set his school bag near the table in the living room. "Are Dojima and Nanako out?"

Nodding, Yu checked the rice cooker. "Nanako is at a friend's house, she'll be back later."

The beef needed another half hour or more of simmering, so Yu brought out drinks and declared that studying would begin. Yosuke moaned and griped but still took out his history book, rummaging through his pencil bag for a highlighter.

Twenty minutes in, Yosuke was rubbing at his hair with an aggravated sound. "I hate history," he groaned. "It's all memorization. I'm crap at that and I know it."

Yu laughed softly, sitting back, the corner of the table separating himself and his less than pleased study partner. "You just need better mnemonic devices."

"Nemma-wha?"

Yu explained, and Yosuke listened intently. His eyes lit up as he grasped the concept fully ("Wait, so, like - if I associate it with a song, or something -"), and Yu let him go back through his notes, watching. He noted that Yosuke's roots were becoming more visible, dark brown peeking out from his scalp. The orange he usually dyed it had dulled, his hair a soft caramel. Yu had never seen Yosuke's natural hair color, he doubted anyone in Inaba had.

Then dinner was done, or at least the meat was soft enough to serve, and the two boys shoved their books aside and ate. Yosuke's compliments didn't cease, mostly in the form of muffled words spoken around a mouth full of beef and rice.

They watched a TV drama while they ate, the acting horribly overdone to the point of humor. Yu left the table to clean up and put the leftovers away. He expected Yosuke to stay at the table watching the show, but his friend joined him, leaning against the counter and chattering away while Yu washed their plates. It was so comfortable, Yosuke's talkative nature easily carrying the conversation. It felt right, it felt good. To have his friend back beside him made a light, easy feeling settle in Yu's chest.

Fed and entertained, Yu dragged Yosuke up to his room to continue studying, away from the distraction of cable television. It went fine for nearly an hour, until Yosuke's restlessness reared its head and he pushed his book away.

"Enough, I need a break." Yosuke let his head flop against Yu's couch cushions.

"Fair enough." Yu put his pencil down and slipped a paper into his book to mark his spot before closing it. They lapsed into a comfortable silence, Yu watching Yosuke from across the table, breathing deep with his head back. It was nice to have this back.

Yosuke sighed, lifted his head, and gave Yu a lopsided grin. "So how's everything with Rise going?"

The question sent a chill through Yu's stomach, his expression crumbling. He frowned and shook his head. "I don't want to talk about that."

Yosuke scoffed, propping a knee up. "Aw, c'mon, man. Dish with me for a second."

The ease that surrounded Yu disappeared like a puff of smoke. He shifted, uncomfortable in his skin as Yosuke stared him down.

"Let it go, Yosuke."

"Why?"

"Just...!" Irritation was creeping up Yu's spine, quivering and sickly. He wanted the conversation to go anywhere else, and now. He rubbed his temples and took a breath, trying to stay calm. "I don't want to gossip about Rise. She's my friend. _Our_ friend, Yosuke."

He wasn't expecting Yosuke to sneer at him, a motion he hadn't seen in months. "Jeeze, I'm not asking you to tell me anything super private, man, chill!" Yosuke shifted from the floor up to the couch, folding his arms around his chest and hunching his shoulders. "I just want to know how shit's going with your new girlfriend, Christ."

"She's not my girlfriend!"

Yosuke recoiled in his spot on the couch, pressing himself back into the cushions, his face painted in shock. Yu's skin flashed hot. He hadn't meant to raise his voice, he hadn't meant to say that. It had come from somewhere else, someone else's mouth. He sputtered, trying to regain his composure.

"I - I didn't mean-"

But then Yosuke was standing, his face going red, eyebrows creased and scowling. "Save it," he said, moving to roughly cram his books into his messenger bag. "I'm going home."

Yu's stomach clenched as he watched, confused and aggravated. What had just happened? Everything had been fine, they'd been getting along fantastically, and then it all just... exploded. He got to his feet, legs shaking.

"Yosuke, don't."

But he didn't listen, and Yu stood frozen as his best friend made to leave. He panicked, gripped with the need to stop Yosuke, make him stay, talk, because this was all insane and Yu didn't even know what was happening anymore, but Yosuke was pushing open the bedroom door and going for the stairs.

Yosuke was already four steps down when Yu's legs finally carried him forward, his arm shooting out to latch on to a bicep. Yosuke yelped a curse, flailing, twisting out of Yu's grip with a snarl. The movement sent him off-balance, his sock slipping on the polished wood of the stairs.

There was a squeak, another curse, and Yosuke was tumbling down the remaining stairs, shoulder bag spilling books as he went.

It happened so fast that Yu didn't register what happened until Yosuke was sprawled face down on the landing below. He snapped to attention and scrambled down, nearly slipping on the last two steps, his heart flying into his throat as he went and his brain a scramble of _he's hurt oh god he's hurt he's dead it's my fault oh god it's my fault -_

But Yosuke groaned and stirred, picking himself up from the floor and turning over. Yu's knees thumped against the hardwood as he kneeled beside him, his hands flying to Yosuke's shoulders.

"Oh my god, Yosuke, are you okay?"

Shaking his head as if to clear it, Yosuke sat up a little more and winced. "Ow. Yeah, I think so."

Yu had to bend over and take a deep breath, then another, his heart still hammering in his chest. "I'm sorry," he spoke mostly to the floor. "I shouldn't have yelled at you, I'm sorry -"

Rubbing at his neck, Yosuke only shrugged, shifting. "Nah, man. It's... I kinda - ow!"

Yu's eyes snapped to where his friend was now clutching at his right foot. "Are you hurt?"

There was no response for a few seconds, save for painful hissing. "Damn," Yosuke bit out. "I think I fucked up my ankle."

Shame washed over Yu, intensely hot, and he chewed at his bottom lip. "Here, let's - let's get you to the kitchen." He slid the strap of Yosuke's bag over his head and pushed it aside.

It took a bit of maneuvering, given that Yosuke refused to let Yu carry him, to get his injured friend into the light. He sat on the kitchen table and let Yu prop his foot up on a chair, gently peeling away part of his sock. The joint was already beginning to swell, the skin tender enough to make Yosuke hiss through his teeth when Yu touched it.

"Can you move it?"

There was a tiny roll of his foot, then side to side. "Yeah, but it hurts."

"Bad?"

"I've had worse."

Yu let out a long breath. "You didn't break it, then. Probably just sprained. Stay here."

As he left to fetch the first aid kit, Yu thought he heard a soft 'where would I go,' but didn't pursue it. He returned with an elastic bandage, pushing Yosuke's pant leg up.

"Tell me if I wrap it too tight, okay?"

Yosuke remained silent as Yu carefully wrapped the bandage around his ankle - a skill learned from the Student Health Committee - and secured it with a metal clip.

"You should call your mom to pick you up, it's not good to walk on it like that."

Nodding, Yosuke lowered his foot on to the chair, letting his other leg dangle over the edge of the table. Like this, his head was a bit higher than Yu's, even slumped as he was. Yosuke was chewing at his lip and staring at the tatami floor of the living room, his hands fidgeting in his lap. The sight made nervous energy seep back into Yu's veins, and he shifted his weight, looking away.

"...Thanks."

Yosuke finally looked at Yu then, only for a brief moment, before his eyes darted away to a spot on the far wall. "We've been at each other's throats lately, huh?"

Yu let out a tiny, strained chuckle. "I wouldn't go that far, but... yeah."

A long stretch of silence fell. Then Yosuke straightened up, looking Yu in the eyes. "I don't want to fight with you."

That one sentence was enough to calm Yu, make the tight pull of his shoulders and back relax a bit. "I don't either."

Yosuke cracked a small smile. "Man. What are we even doing?"

Yu grinned back. "I have no idea."

Brown eyes widened, and then a pair of arms went up in defeat. "Well, shit. If _you_ don't know what we're doing, then we're doomed."

"At least we're doomed together?"

Yosuke stared at him in disbelief, then swatted his arm with a grin. Yu feigned injury, and the two broke out in a long series of giggles. As the laughter tapered off, Yosuke held out his right hand, and Yu clasped it automatically in the handshake they would frequently share after battles.

"Partners?" Yosuke asked.

"Partners."

And the easy feeling was back, Yosuke's fingers hot against Yu's palm, his best friend grinning back at him. Having Yosuke by his side again made the adrenaline give one last surge in Yu's system, the strong hand in his, Yosuke's thigh burning where it touched the side of Yu's hip.

Yu examined his friend closely, from the dark roots of his hair to the freckles on his cheekbones, the slight upturn of Yosuke's nose and his sharp jaw. Yu watched Yosuke's adam's apple bob as he swallowed, gaze raking up to his full lips...

And it _hit him_ , it hit him so hard he was amazed that he remained standing. Yosuke was so close, inches away, and Yu could smell him, Yosuke's smell, his orange shampoo and his skin - all at once Yu's brain short circuited, some tiny, still functioning portion informing him that he was gaping, eyes darting between Youske's eyes and lips, his freckles and hair, and Yosuke looked so incredible and oh god he smelled _so good_ and he was staring back and Yu felt like he could _faint --_

A jangle of keys, and the front door slid open with a bang. The two boys jumped apart as Nanako came into the kitchen.

"Hey Big Bro, what's -" She gasped as she spotted Yosuke's wrapped ankle. "Are you hurt? Do you need a doctor?"

Yu extracted himself and pretended to check his phone as Nanako fussed over Yosuke. His face was hot enough to make him dizzy, Yosuke's voice just behind him.

"I'm okay, Nanako, really! I, uh. Just gotta call my mom."

While Yosuke dialed his cell phone, Yu all but dashed for the bathroom, somehow managing to not slam the door shut. He'd have to go back out eventually - He'd need to walk Yosuke to the door and help him into the car. He'd have to. But he felt both cold and hot, shaking all over. Just then, before Nanako came home, he'd _wanted._ Wanted _so much,_ and it was difficult to pinpoint exactly what he was wanting, beside that it was _Yosuke, Yosuke, Yosuke._

And now that he'd acknowledged it, he couldn't erase the thought or will it away.

Yosuke's mother came quickly, much to Yu's relief, and he helped Yosuke limp over to his shoes, putting one on and leaving his wrapped foot bare. Yu remembered promising to bring Yosuke his books the next day, the ones he'd left on the staircase and the landing, but it was a blur, like he was looking down on himself.

When he went to bed, the memory of Yosuke's scent haunted him. He scrubbed at his face, staring at his ceiling, ignoring the chirp of a text from his phone.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took me a while. I deliberated for a long time on how to approach this scenario. Hopefully it came out okay.

Yosuke tried to convince his mother that he was fine, no Mom, it's okay, it's just an ankle - but the next morning he ended up at the doctor's office with a nurse prodding at the swollen joint anyway. At least it meant getting out of morning classes.

It did look worse than before he'd gone to sleep. His whole right ankle was puffed up so much that he couldn't really see knot of bone anymore, the skin turning an ugly purple. He must've really messed it up when he fell. If Yu hadn't been there to wrap it as well as he did, it might have been even worse by now.

The memory of sitting on the Dojima kitchen table played through Yosuke's head. He'd been so mad at his partner before the tumble down the stairs, though he wasn't entirely sure why. It had something to do with Rise, maybe? Yosuke remembered felling left out - locked out, like he could feel Yu pushing him away, a wall rising between them. And it had made Yosuke so, so angry, Susano-O wailing and raging inside his chest.

So he lashed out, and now here he was, getting instructed on how to properly walk with crutches.

It really could be worse, though. He could still be fighting with Yu. But they'd made up, again, so Yosuke supposed it was all good. He'd never had a best friend before, so he was sort of playing this by ear.

There had been something in Yu's face right as they'd made their peace; a tiny brightening, the skin at the corners of his eyes smoothing out and his jaw going slack. It looked like he'd suddenly remembered something, like he'd forgotten a giant homework assignment until that moment. Yosuke would have to ask him about it.

\-----

Chie was the one who texted him, not Yu, about why he wasn't in class. Yosuke shrugged it off and answered her, figuring his partner wouldn't have to ask. Yu saw him get hurt, after all.

His mother took him for a fast food lunch, then drove him all the way up to the school gates. It took several minutes of promising he'd stay off his right leg before she let him go. Of course, if they could get inside the TV at Junes, it wouldn't be an issue for much longer. Hefting his bag higher on his shoulder, Yosuke began the annoyingly long trek up to the second floor for afternoon classes.

He made it inside classroom 2-2 before lunch period was over, amazingly enough, having been stopped by nearly everyone to ask what happened. He watched Yu's face whip up from where it was glued to his desk to greet Yosuke, his expression looking vaguely panicked.

"Whoa," Chie greeted, turning in her seat as Yosuke went for his desk. "I wasn't expecting the crutches. Just how hurt are you?"

Sliding into his seat, Yosuke winced a bit as his ankle was jostled. "It's just a sprain, but it hurts to put weight on it." He fumbled with his crutches, having no place to put them near his desk. Yu seemed to snap to attention, muttering a bit and taking the crutches to the corner where he leaned them against the wall.

"I'll get them for you when class is over," Yu spoke softly as he returned to his chair.

"Yosuke," Yukiko leaned towards him, motioning for Yosuke to do the same. He mirrored her, leaning as far over his desk as he could.

"We should go into the TV today. I could heal that in no time."

Yosuke nodded, agreeing. "I had the same idea. It might take me some time to actually get to Junes, but I'd rather do that then wait for this ankle to heal the old fashioned way."

Chie and Yu nodded in agreement. Yu seemed to be avoiding Yosuke's gaze, keeping his eyes set forward.

\-----

It really did take quite a bit of time to get to Junes, Yosuke forced to move at a snail's pace. The crutches were already beginning to chafe his armpits, even through the layers of his shirts, and his wrists were aching from balancing his weight. Kanji had offered a piggy back ride, but Yosuke refused. It might have been less painful for his body, but not his pride.

The entire group went with him, the girls chattering away, Kanji and Naoto making small, slightly strained conversation. Yosuke had to shake his head at them. If they'd both just get over themselves, they'd make a great couple.

Rise was attached to Yu. Nothing out of the ordinary there. But Yu looked a little pale, letting Rise hug his arm, but not really returning the gesture. He caught Yosuke's eye once and quickly looked away.

Maneuvering inside Junes was a whole new challenge. He had to avoid certain coworkers and, most importantly, his dad, who would likely shove him in the car and drive him home with a scolding if he was caught.

After two elevator trips, one stairwell, hiding behind a rack of clothes and texting Teddie for a diversion, they made it to the giant flat screen TV in the electronics section. Yosuke carefully hid the crutches behind a display and balanced on his left leg.

"Alright, who's coming in with me? Besides Yukiko."

Kanji waved with a 'yo' and Naoto nodded. Chie shrugged, looking at her phone. Yosuke looked at Yu, with Rise at his side. His partner looked sick, if he was honest.

"We'll meet you in the foot court when you're done," Yu said. Yosuke just nodded at him, turning to clamor through the TV screen.

He had not factored the landing into his equation.

Yosuke was about to land on both feet, but remembered his ankle at the last second. He tucked and rolled away, but the motion still brought a searing pain shooting up from his lower leg. He stayed on the ground, clutching his ankle and blinking away a few tears.

"Yosuke!" Yukiko rushed to his side. "Are you alright?"

He nodded, teeth firmly embedded in his lower lip, hissing. "Yeah," he ground out. "Yeah. Damn, that hurt."

Yukiko breathed out in relief, standing. "Well, I think I can take care of that." Her arcana rose from her hand and Yukiko swiped it with her fan, with far less flourish than in battle, and summoned Amaterasu. The Diarama spell washed over Yosuke, pleasantly cool in a way that made goosebumps prickle over his skin. He could feel the flesh of his ankle knitting back together, tendons shrinking and blood dispersing. It was a sensation he'd probably never get used to, feeling his own muscles and organs move like that.

With the pain gone, Yosuke stood and tested his weight on his right leg. There was still a bit of soreness, but it was more than manageable.

"Better?" Yukiko had her fan ready.

Yosuke nodded. "Oh yeah, much better, thanks. I'll have to keep pretending to use the crutches for a couple of days, though. Sprains aren't supposed to heal overnight."

The electronics section was thankfully still deserted when they exited, Yosuke fishing his crutches out from their hiding spot. No longer worried about getting caught, Yosuke went for the elevator with Yukiko, Kanji and Naoto taking the other elevator down to the ground floor. Chie had gone off somewhere else, Teddie presumably still on his shift in the grocery section.

Exiting the elevator and going out on to the roof, Yosuke spied Yu at their usual table. Rise was walking towards them, and it took Yosuke a second to realize how her eyes were shining as she brushed past them. Not good. He turned to watch her go towards the elevator and nudge Yukiko's arm.

"Go after her," Yosuke whispered. Yukiko nodded and dashed after Rise.

Glancing around the food court to make sure it was clear of coworkers he knew, Yosuke carried his crutches and walked to their team table in quick, long strides. Yu was slumped in his chair, staring at the pavement at his feet. He didn't budge until Yosuke moved into the chair facing him, the chair legs scraping away as he sat.

Yu jerked, his whole body jumping like a startled animal. He stared wide eyed at Yosuke for a few seconds before slumping again, letting out an uneasy breath.

"Everything okay?" Yosuke knew the answer was 'no,' but he felt the need to ask anyway. His partner rubbed at the back of his neck, a nervous motion.

"I broke up with her," Yu answered quietly, letting the hand at his neck drop to smack against his thigh.

"Shit." Yosuke's eyes scanned the food court, making sure it was free of gossipers. He hadn't been expecting that. "What happened?" Dread pooled in Yosuke's stomach, accompanied by a sudden wave of nausea. "...Was it -" he fumbled. "Is it my fault? Because of the fight...?"

Yu quickly shook his head. "No, no! Nothing like that. It's just..." He trailed off, grimacing, like he was having trouble swallowing. "I just... don't like her like that. And I couldn't keep leading her on." Yu was rubbing his hands together above his knees. "She's my friend."

Yosuke was nodding, but he was having trouble digesting the words. He would've fought off a million waves of shadows for the opportunity to date Rise Kujikawa, so the idea that anyone wouldn't want her never even crossed his mind. But Rise was a person, he mused, and sometimes people just... didn't fit. And there wasn't always a rhyme or reason why. It wasn't a terribly comfortable realization for Yosuke, his leg bouncing against his chair.

The atmosphere became oppressively tense. Yu looked almost like he wanted to say more, glancing up at Yosuke every few seconds, but he remained quiet. They left the food court and said short goodbyes.

"You can text me if you need anything," Yosuke said as they exited Junes. Yu looked at him, a deer caught in headlights, nodding curtly before walking away.

He didn't get a text that night.

\-----

Walking on crutches was annoying, but pretending to walk on crutches was an extreme exercise in patience - a thing that Yosuke wasn't exactly known for having. He made sure to limp when his mother could see him, and diligently shoved the crutches under his arms when he was dropped off at school. As soon as she was gone, he dropped his right foot and let himself walk, swinging the crutches as more of an afterthought than anything.

At least it meant he wouldn't have to work any shifts at Junes for a few days.

Classes dragged. With his ankle, he couldn't go into the TV. Not because of his injury, but because his parents were keeping close tabs on his whereabouts, worried that he might somehow make it worse. Yosuke wanted to be offended by the notion, but given his usual luck, he really couldn't blame them.

He was also worried for Yu. His partner was more than a little out of sorts since his breakup on the Junes roof. He was both distant and jittery, having trouble responding to questions in class (an absolute first, Yosuke was certain). He tried asking Yu if he was alright several times, and was met only with "I'll be okay." Which wasn't exactly assuring. Yu was quiet, sure, but his recent body language made it painfully clear that he was anything but okay.

The pattern continued for the next two days. It was eating at Yosuke, only getting one word repsonses to texts, if Yu bothered to respond at all. He couldn't tell if his partner was talking to anyone else in their group; Yu seemed to be on lockdown.

On Saturday morning, Yosuke went to school, deciding that it would be the last day he would put up with the crutches farce. His mother had scheduled him for a doctor's appointment that afternoon, hopefully he could convince them that he was just a really fast healer.

Before he made it to the stairs, Yosuke spied a head of grey hair down hallway by the first year classrooms. It was Yu, and he was talking to Rise. Yosuke couldn't hear them, but they didn't seem upset, their posture casual and relaxed. Yu's back was to Yosuke, so he couldn't see his expression, but Rise was smiling softly as she spoke.

She caught sight of Yosuke and grinned wide. Keeping her eyes locked on his, she said something to Yu that made him whip around in surprise. Yosuke stood by the stairs, a bit baffled, while his friends spoke in hushed tones while staring straight at him. It was a little unnerving, but if Rise was smiling like that, then maybe they'd made amends.

If Yosuke thought Yu was experiencing a blue screen for the past two days, it was nothing compared to how he was for the rest of Saturday, doing a stellar impression of a brick wall. The tension didn't leave his shoulders for a second, even as he walked away from the shoe lockers towards the door. Yosuke caught him by the shoulder before he could escape.

"Hey man," Yosuke tried to keep his tone level. Yu looked positively terrified, his gaze flicking from Yosuke's face to the hand on his arm.

"You know you can talk to me, right?" Yosuke prompted. "I'm your partner."

Yu stared at him, then nodded, and walked away without a word.

Later that night, Yosuke was sorting through his CD collection when his phone chirped. It was a text from Yu, the first one he'd gotten in days without prompting.

_> Can you meet me at the hill tomorrow around noon? I want to talk to you._

It was vaguely worrying, but Yu had just broken up with Rise (were they even really dating? They had been together for barely a week). He probably wanted support. Yosuke felt warm at the thought. Yu wasn't the type to ask for help, but he was asking Yosuke.

_> sure thing prtnr_

\-----

Sunday was a glorious day off for Yosuke, especially since he'd managed to get out of one last shift at work. The doctor had agreed to let him off the crutches in exchange for a soft ankle brace - completely useless, but still better than having to fake an injury. At the very least, it put his mother's mind at ease.

Yosuke began the walk up to the hill at half past eleven, wanting to take the scenic route and mentally prepare. It wasn't often he was asked for advice. It was usually the other way around, he was the one who was screwing up and in need of direction. But if his partner needed support, he could man up and give it.

Yu was already on the hill when Yosuke arrived, a good ten minutes early. Yu was hunched over with his hands on the fence railing. He didn't notice Yosuke until his name was called, and he jumped back, startled.

"Yosuke!" Yu breathed out, putting a hand to his chest. "You startled me."

Pausing and pocketing his mp3 player, Yosuke shrugged. "I'd apologize for being early, but you're just as early, so whatever." He shuffled beside Yu and stared out at the town below. "So? What's on your mind, partner?"

Yu didn't answer right away, though his jaw was working. He was sweating, Yosuke noted, even though the air had finally cooled from the long, hot summer. Yu looked scared, like he might scamper off if Yosuke made one wrong move. The look didn't suit him at all, and Yosuke found himself wishing for the return of his usual stoic gaze.

"Do you remember when Naoto said she thought we were dating?"

Yosuke flashed hot at the question. "Oh man. How could I forget?"

"And?" Yu swallowed loudly. "What did you think of that?"

The question sent a small chime of warning through Yosuke's head. "Huh? Well, I thought it was ridiculous. Duh."

Yu's face twisted. "Was it?"

The small warning in Yosuke's head turned into a wailing alarm, his stomach dropping. Yu had turned to face him, and the confidence Yosuke had built up on the walk to the hill shattered. He dully noted that Yu was trembling, his hands visibly shaking as he chewed at his lip.

"Why do you ask?" Yosuke squeaked, his voice unsteady.

Yu's cheeks were pink, his lower lip red where it was bitten, his jaw and neck shining with sweat. "I like you," Yu said, more breath than actual words.

Yosuke froze. Did he hear that right? There was no way. This was a fever dream. He'd stayed up too late eating peppered corn chips again and this was the result. But then Yu opened his mouth and all of Yosuke's hopes of fantasy drained out through his feet.

"I didn't even realize it at first," Yu's words were uneven, his voice cracking. "You're my best friend. I've never had that - never been close to anyone before, so I... I didn't get it. Not until someone else pointed it out to me."

Every last inch of Yosuke was screaming to run, run away as fast as you can and don't ever look back. Only his loyalty to his partner kept his feet planted in the grass on the hill. Or the hope that this was an elaborate prank. He couldn't tell. "You can't mean that," he croaked. "You've gotta be shitting me."

Pain creased Yu's face, and he stared at the ground for a few beats. "I'm not. This is..." Hands flailing, as if to say what his voice wouldn't. "I think there's something here, Yosuke - " Yu's right hand gestured to the space between them.

"No." The word was out of Yosuke's mouth before he'd realized. "That's not - what the fuck, man?" He unfroze and took a bold step forward, anger erupting from somewhere deep and primal. "What makes you think that?"

Now Yu's face had gone pale, ashen white that made his hair look darker. "Because," Yu began, then stopped to clench his fists together.

"Because if there wasn't anything there, would it have bothered us so bad?" Yu let his hands drop as he continued. "Or would we'd have just laughed it off, and gone on like nothing happened?"

The words sunk in. Yosuke felt something click in his head, a cog gently slipping into place, and bringing with it a wave of panic and despair. Pieces were starting to fit themselves together and form a pattern that he'd refused to let assemble until now, forming a picture he'd told himself countless times since meeting Yu that he didn't want to see, that he was better without.

"Yosuke?"

A step back, and then another. Yosuke couldn't stand to look at Yu's face, scrunched up like he was ready to start crying any second. So he turned and walked away, steps getting faster and faster as he went, trying without success to block out the quiet sob behind him.

He ran all the way home.

Yosuke locked his door, not caring that Teddie would be home from his shift in a few hours. The gears in his head were turning and grinding, making the space beneath his temples pound furiously. Yu had confessed to him. The second confession Yosuke had gotten in his miserable life, and it was from Yu. His best friend. Another guy. What was he even supposed to say to that? Was there even protocol? Could they even be friends after that?

His stomach churned and flipped at the thought. Yu meant so much to him. So, so much. Did this mean it was over? Maybe it could be salvaged. Yukiko had turned Yosuke down, and now they were good friends. It could be alright, maybe, if he gave it time and space. Yu could get over him and go after one of the dozens of girls that were lining up for him.

Yosuke flopped onto his bed, sending a few CDs and magazines to the floor. He gave them a glance, one of the magazine covers framing a group of teenage idols in matching blue dresses.

He thought of Rise. She had been in the line to Yu. Not just in the line, but _first_ in line. If there was ever a girl with more drive to become Mrs. Narukami, Yosuke hadn't met her. Rise was at the front of the mile long list of people that wanted Yu. And he'd refused her.

Yu had dumped Rise for him.

For Yosuke Hanamura, the poster boy of disappointment.

And he liked the idea - the thought manifested before Yosuke could push it away. Yu would rather have Yosuke than Rise, the prettiest girl ever, or Yukiko, or Chie, or Ozawa or Ai or any of them.

Being wanted was such a foreign feeling. Warmth blossomed in Yosuke's chest, so strong he had to take a steadying breath. Yu liked him. Yu wanted _him._ The guy that could have anything and anyone in the world, and he wanted Yosuke. He pictured Yu, with his nice nose and pretty eyes and perfect hair, tall and strong and smart, kind and generous.

And for just one second, Yosuke let himself picture Yu smiling a smile that was just for him, a smile that said _I like you_ and _stay with me_ and _I'm yours_ all at once. And for that one second the image was so nice, warm and comforting and giddy.

It disappeared as the fear came back in a tidal wave of cold nausea, Yu's smile erased by thoughts of whispers in the hallways at school and judgmental stares. He was so lost. It was too much to process in one day, his head aching and his stomach clenching as he tried in vain to swallow around the lump in his throat.

Yosuke turned over, buried his face in his pillow, and cried.


	8. Chapter 8

When Nanako called him down for dinner, Yu told her he didn't feel well.

It wasn't far from the truth. After Yosuke left him on the hill, he'd stayed by the fence for a good hour, crying. He'd screwed it all up. He should have known that it would pan out that way, given the way his best friend tended to treat Kanji. But Rise's optimism was infectious, convincing Yu that everything would work out if he was honest with himself.

One he'd arrived home, Yu had stripped out of his jacket, crawled into his futon, and curled in on himself. He was angry. Mostly at himself, and maybe a tiny bit at Rise. He knew it wasn't fair to blame her, but a part of him still wanted to. He could have learned to silence his heart and bind his affection, and it would have been fine. Yosuke would have still been his friend.

Now? Who knew. Yosuke looked so alarmed on the hill, eyes going impossibly wide and jaw slackening. Yu remembered seeing that expression when they faced Yosuke's shadow; disbelief, fear, and anger, raw and painful and real.

The night that Yosuke hurt his ankle, the realization had been enough to make Yu's head spin. Once his nerves calmed enough to let him think properly, he couldn't help but muse that it was always there. Maybe from the day they'd met, when Yu pulled Yosuke's grumbling form out of the trash and helped clean the debris from his hair. But it was buried under the avalanche of school, friends, social links, and the TV World. The suggestion that he and Yosuke were dating didn't create the emotion, just finally brought it bubbling to the surface.

Yu heaved a tired breath and rolled over under his blanket.

\-----

Nanako tapped on his door the next morning. He barely heard it, having silenced his phone hours ago.

"Big bro?"

With a squeak his door cracked open. Yu peeked out from his covers to find his cousin in his doorway.

"Are you sick?"

Yu nodded. "I'll stay home from school today." He didn't have to feign the roughness in his voice, caused by hours of on and off crying through the night.

"Alright," Nanako shuffled back. "Take some medicine and drink lots of water. Okay?"

"I will. Have a good day at school."

Nanako closed the door, and Yu listened to the tiny shuffling of her feet down the stairs. He waited for a count of twenty after the front door closed to haul himself from his futon, still wearing his clothes from yesterday.

Yu scrubbed at his face. He couldn't handle today. He'd have to own up to his actions, mostly likely sooner rather than later, but not today. He couldn't even think, much less function. Fishing some clean underclothes and pajamas from his drawers, Yu thumped down the stairs for the bath, letting his weight carry him down.

Clean and changed, his clothes went in the wash, and Yu set to tidying up the main floor of the house. It was simple, menial, and kept his mind from wandering in useless circles. There was no point in thinking too hard about it. Hang up the wash, put away the dishes. The damage was done and Yu couldn't take his words back.

Once the chores were done, Yu was left to his own devices in the silent house. He needed to eat, he knew, but his appetite was gone. He made a cup of tea and forced himself to drink it.

At lunchtime, while he was nestled into the couch half-watching a daytime drama, Yu finally checked his phone. There were texts from Yukiko and Chie, which he scrolled past. The text from Rise caught his attention.

_> You aren't at school?? How'd it go with Yosuke???_

For just a second the feeling of that moment came back, Yu's heart sinking into his stomach and the heat draining from his fingers and toes. He swallowed thickly, pushing down bile, and typed out a response.

_> Poorly._

_> D: D: D:_  
_> I'm coming to your place after school_

'That's not necessary' is how Yu wanted to respond, but he'd learned better than to stand in Rise's way. She was an extremely persuasive girl. He put his phone aside and tried his best to focus on whatever was playing on TV.

\-----

At 4:52 (not that Yu was watching the minutes tick by - though he completely was), there was a knock at the door. He went to answer it, not caring that he was in rumpled pajamas.

"Yes?"

The door slid open and Rise took a step inside, her school uniform pristine, a plastic bag on her arm. She smiled up at Yu, then her expression quickly shifted into surprised when she looked him up and down.

"Senpai," her voice was strained. "You look terrible."

He nodded. "Come in."

Rise removed her shoes and followed Yu into the kitchen, setting the bag on her arm down and taking out a container. Yu took a cup from the cabinet and poured her some tea.

"I brought some fresh ganmodoki," she said, placing the wrapped container between them. Yu took a seat and nodded a small thanks. They sat in silence for several minutes, Yu staring into his tea cup.

"Why don't you tell me what happened?"

So Yu told her, not bothering to omit any of the embarrassing details. The entire even had left him wrung out and, he noted with some fascination, strangely numb.

"Yosuke just... left?" Rise asked once he'd finished talking. Yu nodded.

"He _ran._ " Yu took a sip of his tea, his voice still weak and raw.

Rise folded her hands and frowned. "I was so sure he... I mean, everything about how he acts towards you says he's smitten." She looked thoughtful then, tapping her chin with her knuckle.

"I'll talk to Yosuke tomorrow," Rise decided. Yu almost spilled his tea as he reached out to grip her wrist.

"Please don't," he said, his voice shaking.

Rise stared at his hand, then his face, before gently removing his hand and holding it between her own.

"You can't just let this fall apart, Senpai. Yosuke is your best friend." She patted his hands. "And besides, how can we work as a team until this is resolved?"

Yu's jaw went slack. He'd been so preoccupied with Yosuke that he hadn't considered how it might be affecting the rest of his friends. The numbness gave way to a hot wash of guilt. Before Yu could respond, the front door opened, and small footsteps pattered inside.

"I'm home!" Nanako's voice came from the entrance. Rise smiled at Yu and let go of his hands, straightening up to stand.

"Oh, Rise!" Nanako trotted over. "Hi!"

The two girls chatted for a bit before Rise made to leave. She sent a knowing nod to Yu, and went for her shoes. After she was gone, Nanako went to Yu's side.

"Are you feeling better, big bro?"

Yu forced a smile. "Yes, I'm alright. Look, Rise brought us some ganmodoki for dinner."

Nanako was delighted enough to drop the subject of his health, which was something of a relief. Yu cooked some rice to go with the ganmodoki and dug out a bottle of fruit juice from the fridge. They ate as the quiz show played, and afterwards Nanako offered to do the dishes.

"You should go rest, so you don't have to miss more school," she said. Yu could only nod and obey her.

Back in his room, Yu slipped into his futon and opened his phone. He went into his photo gallery and found the selfie with Yosuke they'd taken by the river. He hadn't so much as looked at the photo since he'd replaced it as his phone's background. Yosuke was smiling next to him still, surprisingly, as if Yu somehow expected the photo to change in reflection of recent events.

He hadn't seen that smile in what felt like weeks. Months. Eons. He'd give anything to see it again. Closing his phone and settling down, Yu resolved to repair their friendship, no matter what it took. Even if it meant shoving his feelings down for the rest of his life.

\-----

Tuesday morning dawned, and Yu was up early to bathe. He managed to choke down two pieces of toast before his stomach refused any more, and left the house twice - he had to turn back a block away to retrieve his forgotten phone.

No one bothered him on his walk to school, and upon arriving, it seemed as if the crowds were parting to let him through. Yu mused that his exhaustion must be showing on his face. He'd been told before that he could have a fairly impressive bitchface when he was tired. It would explain how the first years were practically diving out of his way.

In the classroom, he tried not to look over at Yosuke's desk, but it was right in his line of vision and it was impossible not to. Yu locked eyes with his best friend for all of a second before they both looked away. It was enough to see how haggard Yosuke was, his eyes red rimmed and lined with dark circles.

Yu took his seat without a word or another glance.

Concentrating on the lecture was an exercise in futility. Kashiwagi's words were filtering in and out, Yu only catching every other sentence. She was rattling on about fashion or makeup or god knows what. He caught the word 'Aztec' at some point, the two syllables bouncing around in his brain.

"Mister Hanamura!"

With a scrape of a chair leg, Yu heard Yosuke scramble to his feet. Kashiwagi's eyebrow was raised.

"Can you tell me what we're talking about? Or are you zoning out as usual?"

Yu could hear Yosuke fumbling behind him, and the urge to provide the answer overtook his better senses. He folded his hands in front of his face and turned just enough so that Yosuke would hear him, and whispered 'Aztecs.'

Yosuke sputtered, not quite getting the answer out. Kashiwagi only sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Mister Narukami, if you're going to provide Mister Hanamura with the answers, you could at least learn to be more discreet about it."

Yu's face went hot as he heard Yosuke slump into his seat. He spent the rest of the lecture staring at the wood grain of his desk.

When lunch came, Yosuke left the classroom. Yu stayed at his desk and put his head down, and left it down through afternoon classes.

As the final bell for the day rang, Yosuke scurried out of the classroom. Yu took his time packing up to lessen the chances of running into him on his way out. The last thing either of them needed was a confrontation at school, and Yu was still slowly piecing his courage back together.

Turning down several offers to hang out, Yu tried to leave the school as quickly as he could. On his way to the front gate, a flash of orange caught his eye. Tucked in a corner of the courtyard, near the outer wall, Yosuke was standing with Rise, facing away from Yu. Yosuke was hunched in on himself, shoulders up and arms crossed tight over his chest. Yu couldn't hear them, he could only see Rise's mouth moving and Yosuke's head shaking in response.

Yu hurried away before he was noticed.

\-----

Wednesday came, and Yu awoke slowly and with no small effort. He ached, his head and back and eyes all sore from a night of tossing and turning. It had been two days since the hill, most likely the longest two days of his life.

As he ate breakfast, hardly tasting the food, Yu received a few texts from the rest of the team. They were asking if he was okay, how are you senpai, do you need anything? He clicked out a simple _'I'll be alright'_ to each of them and finished his rice.

His newfound antisocial tendencies weren't going unnoticed by his friends. But he was so weak, wrung out and sapped. Yu didn't have the will to be a leader, not right now.

At school, Yu kept to himself. It was eerily similar to his existence in the city, when the pressure to keep his mind on his studies left little time for a social life. Keep his head down, study, get ahead. Yu felt the numbness of those days creeping back in, the warmth of his new friends and family becoming muted.

That night, Yu dreamed of Yosuke, walking with him along the Samegawa. Yosuke was laughing, light and airy, his bright smile and beautiful hair and voice like sunshine. It was like music, and it made Yu reach for him, to pull Yosuke closer, to draw him in and keep him. But as soon as their fingers met, Yosuke's laughter died away, and his body disappeared, blown away in the breeze.

With a violent jerk Yu awoke, breathing in the cold air of his room, and felt alone.

\-----

On his walk to school, Yu received a text from Rise.

_> convinced Yosuke to talk it out!!_

He'd never felt panic set in quite so fast, even compared to the first time he faced down a shadow in the TV World. He half debated turning around and skipping school, but the idea was dismissed as quickly as it came. Yu knew that he couldn't keep running. And if Yosuke was willing to talk, then Yu owed it to him (and the rest of their team) to make peace.

Classes were a complete blur. Yu was sure that he'd experienced some form of time travel, the haze of the days' events broken only by the vibrations of Yosuke's leg bouncing in his chair behind him. At the sound of the final bell, Yosuke leapt from his chair and vanished from the room.

Chie asked Yu what was wrong, and he could only shake his head as he took his bag and exited.

Another text from Rise came as he was putting on his shoes, asking him to meet her at the pavilion near the Samegawa. Yu knew exactly what would be waiting for him there - or rather, who. Which would be Yosuke. He took a steadying breath and began his walk.

The pavilion was deserted, the sky already stained orange from the early sunset of the approaching autumn. There was nearly no one around, only a few students walking home and the old man that liked to spend his time by the river. He sat at the picnic table and waited.

Fifteen minutes passed - he knew from checking his watch at least every two - and there came a scuffling from the sidewalk. Yu turned to find Rise dragging Yosuke by the hand down the sidewalk towards the pavilion. Yosuke looked less than pleased, letting tiny Rise yank him along. He looked up and locked eyes with Yu, stopping dead in his tracks.

With a pout and a harsh pull, Rise forced Yosuke to continue up the hill. Yu went hot all over as they approached, looking anywhere but his best friend's face as Rise forced him up onto the cement foundation.

"Alright, you two." Rise put her hands behind her back. "I think you have some stuff to work out." She glanced between them. "And I think Yosuke-senpai has something very important to say."

With that she turned and walked down the hill, but didn't leave. Rise stopped at the sidewalk and stood watch with her back to the two boys, as if she were a bouncer.

The silence went on. Yosuke was completely closed off, hunched and folded and staring at the pavement. Yu needed to say something, he knew, but where should he even start? There were a million things to say. He wanted to apologize, explain himself, promise to never pull a stunt like that again. Instead, what came out of his mouth was: "I miss you."

Yosuke's head snapped up at his words, and his expression crumbled. Yu was worried for a moment that maybe he'd unwittingly shouted at him, but then Yosuke uncurled, just a bit.

"Me too," came the thin response, Yosuke toying with the cord of his headphones as he tended to do when he was nervous.

Yu shifted his weight. "I"m sorry," he began, swallowing hard. "I didn't want this. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable." The next words were so hard, straining his voice. "Can we just... forget all this and go back to being friends? For real this time?"

Yosuke looked pained at that, biting at the inside of his cheek. He opened his mouth several times to speak, but nothing came out, even as he glanced at Rise several times. He seemed to be avoiding looking at Yu's face.

With a huff, Yosuke finally spoke. "I don't think I can do that."

Sucking in a short breath, Yu felt his heart crumbling, a hollow ache forming that spread into his throat. His eyes stung and he didn't have it in him to hold back the tears, rolling down his cheeks in fat drops that trailed down his chin.

"I'm sorry," he said again, focusing his blurring gaze on Yosuke's shoes.

There was a beat of silence, and then Yosuke sputtered and cursed. "Shit, that's not - that's not what I meant!"

Tears still falling, Yu looked at Yosuke's face. His cheeks were bright red, the color stretching all the way down his neck and up to his ears. Yosuke was still stammering, unable to form a coherent sentence, his voice becoming more and more strained.

"I think - " whole words were finally coming out. "I think I might like you too."

Yu couldn't breathe, freezing up. His mind couldn't quite digest what he had heard. "I thought you hated me," he breathed.

Yosuke looked up, his eyes wet. "No, no way, man." He wiped at his face and sniffed loudly. "I'm just -" He sniffed again, crying. "I'm just fucking scared, okay? I'm scared because I don't know what the hell this means but - _fuck_ \- " Yosuke stopped to rub at his face and wipe his nose. "I _like_ you, as more than just a friend, and I d-don't know what I'm supposed to do about it."

It took several seconds to process the words. All of the breath left Yu in one huff, the pain in his chest giving way to a relief that spread throughout his body. Yosuke didn't hate him. He hadn't lost his best friend. Yosuke was still crying quietly, sniffling and wiping his nose with his sleeve. Yu reached out, stepping forward, and drew Yosuke into his arms. His friend stiffened and gasped, then slowly relaxed and sagged against him.

Yu held him tight, closer and more intimate than he would have ever dared before, Yosuke's fists balled up in the front lapels of his uniform jacket. He could smell the orange of Yosuke's hair and the familiar tang of his skin, and inhaled deeply.

Yosuke's breath was still uneven and stuttering as Yu rubbed a gentle circle over one of his shoulder blades. "We can figure it out together, okay?" he whispered against a freckled temple. Yosuke gave a weak nod in response, leaning even more into Yu with a sigh.

From the sidewalk, Yu heard Rise let out a squeal, and smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finishing this fic has taken a lot out of me. Thanks to everyone who's left feedback! Epilogue coming soon.


	9. Epilogue

Once they'd managed to let each other go, Yosuke and Yu left the pavilion behind and went for the Dojima residence. Rise waved at them, not bothering to ask how it went, her whole face beaming.

The repairs to their friendship, or whatever it could be called now, were still too fresh and delicate to risk holding hands or anything of the sort as they walked. Yu's knuckles occasionally brushed against Yosuke's as their arms swung at their sides, breath catching in tiny gasps that gave way to equally tiny smiles.

At home, Yu threw together a meal out of a mishmash of leftovers. The two boys ate with Nanako, listening to her chat about school and stickers and anything else. Dinner done, dishes left to soak, they left Nanako to her quiz show and went to Yu's room.

On the couch, the door locked, they spoke in quiet, hushed voices, letting their emotions roll out of them in waves. Yosuke cried again and Yu held him, Yosuke nearly in his lap, soaking his white shirt with tears and snot. All the fear and confusion that had consumed them both was laid bare. And when there was finally nothing left to hide, Yosuke let out a laugh, a bit hysterical, but full of relief. Yu wiped at his face with the cuff of his sleeve and laughed along.

They said goodnight in the entryway, sharing a nervous, chaste kiss. The first, and full of promise.

\-----

At the Junes food court, the Investigation Team gathered at the picnic table to avoid the light drizzle of the afternoon. Soda cans, chip bags, and candy wrappers littered the table's surface, accompanied by a few cell phones and notebooks.

The mood was light, jokes flying in every direction. The team knew that Yu and Yosuke had finally made amends; it was obvious by their body language. They were talking between classes, texting, hanging out. The balance had returned to the IT.

"So," Rise began, cutting through the chatter. "Anyone got anything going on?" She made a point to look at Yu, her face splitting in a wide grin.

Yu looked over at Yosuke, who blushed just a little. They'd discussed this moment for the last week, being careful to make sure they were on the same page. Yu straightened his shoulders.

"I have an announcement," he said to the group. In unison his friends perked up, eyebrows flying up into hairlines, all eyes on him. Then slowly, deliberately, Yu gently took Yosuke's hand from where it sat next to his soda can and entwined their fingers, palms together.

Yosuke held his gaze as there was silence, then gasping, then shrieking. The picnic table exploded. Teddie wailed, Rise clapped, Naoto nodded her approval, Kanji turned a painful shade of crimson and looked like he might actually _cry_ , and Chie pouted and handed a wad of cash over to a smug Yukiko.

And Yosuke was as pink as he could be, and so was Yu. They released their hands before any employees could see them, keeping their knees touching beneath the table.

Yosuke's phone buzzed and he flipped it open to check. Yu watched as he replied to his dad and minimized the text app, revealing his background. Two smiling faces, with bandages and bruises and dirt on their chins and grass in their hair stared back. Yu gave Yosuke a gentle shove with his shoulder.

"Hey," Yosuke laughed, closing his phone. "Thanks again for that photo."

"No problem."

In his pocket, Yu's phone background had been changed once again, to Yosuke's dirty but smiling face and his own dopey grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! This fic ended up being twice as long and a million times angstier than originally planned. I hope the happy ending is enough to make up for all the crying and emotional roller coasters in this fic. <3


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